Tuesday 13 December 2011

QQ : NUMBER NINETEEN - December 13, 2011

 A ONCE-A-WEEK (or so) LIST OF WHAT I  GIVE A  DAMN ABOUT. WITH 10 = MOST IMPORTANT;  AND 1 = NOT SO MUCH


Tis the Season.  Fa- la- la- la-la

QQ : 1   SURVIVAL OF THE FIT


It was not evolutionary superiority that permitted my mother and my father to survive the camps.
Nor was their survival the product of intelligent design. There was nothing intelligent about it.
All their other immediate family didn’t survive.

My parents both spent the remainder of their lives pondering the un-answerable question:
Why did they survive? Why them?

QQ : 2   FATE

Day by day, it seems one or another of my peers and colleagues are facing their maker.
One ponders the same question; why them, and why now?
Who's the decider?

QQ : 3   THE MEANING OF LIFE

I had a mystical experience as I walked by the mounds of earth containing thousands of bodies at Bergen Belsen.
The signs said: “Here lie 30,000 dead” and then “Here lie 25,000 dead” and a few meters later, “Here lie 20,000 dead”.  
The day was dead calm when suddenly a gale force wind came up.
The wind was so strong, it literally blew me out of there.

The message was clear. Get out of here!  Make some music! 
Make up for the melodies that were lost.
Have a life! Carry on!

QQ : 4   VERDI'S REQUIEM

Despite the most inhumane conditions at Terezin where life was not an option, music uplifted and inspired. My mother sang in the 150 voice choir for 16 performances of Verdi’s Requiem while the sick and starving dropped around her.

Perhaps it was the Verdi that saved her.
Giuseppe Verdi designed an intelligent tune or two.

QQ : 5   THE EURO

And now Germany is back. Germany has the Money, the Resources and the Will. They also have Rules. Germany always has rules.
How ironic that the world's economy teeters on the brink and it is within Germany's power to save us. Am I my father's son? Do the sins of the father pass on? Should we be afraid?
Angela seems so benign. Chancellor or Fuhrer?

QQ : 6   DECK THE HALLS

I have an idea! Let's invent a religion.
All religions need holidays. Let's start with that.
The first holiday involves a rabbit and eggs. I haven't quite figured out what to do with the rabbit or the eggs, but there's a start.
The next holiday involves a dead pine tree in your house draped with some aluminum foil and plastic stuff, and something about a fat man in a red suit who climbs down your chimney. He needs cookies and milk.

If we don't like that religion, we could invent anther one that cuts of bits of penises and prohibits oysters and bacon.

Most religions also mandate funny hats.

Maybe that’s all too violent, especially for the fat man in the chimney.
I personally like the one that prevents women from driving. Makes for less traffic and pollution.

QQ : 7   REL-I-GION

The problem with religion is that right outside Bergen Belsen, the place that I was blown out of, are regular, jolly-looking. well-kept family homes that look out over the camp.
Gestopo officers and their familes sat around the tannenbaum at this time of the year and sang carols and said their prayers and dreamed of the utopia of the master race once they got rid of the undesirables on the other side of the barbed wire.

QQ : 8   UTOPIA

All religions are utopian. They seek an ideal way of life.
I think Fundamentalists who seek to impose their concept of an idyllic life on others because they have received a message from God, should be regarded as insane.

You cannot impose utopia. The attempt to impose a utopian ideal is a crazy act.

Ethnic cleansing is not utopian. Child labour is not utopian. The elimination of social welfare is not utopian and the free market allowed to dominate without controls is not utopian.

Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney seek to impose their concept of a utopian ideal.

They are both insane.

QQ : 9  OFF WITH YOUR HEAD


Say bad things....go to jail, or even "off with your head"!

The "Satanic Verses" was an "off with your head" offence.
And don't say anything mean about the The King of Siam. Deborah Kerr might break out in song.

Don't make an image of the prophet, cover your head, cover your face, face East, genuflect, wear a box on your head, put a sign on your door, count beads and beat your breast, "practice" celibacy until you get it right and remove parts of your anatomy. Chant, sway, pray, flay, get stoned if you work on the sabbath day. Wear white, wear black, don't shave, wear a funny hat and never even think about covetting your neighbor‘s ass.

Do all of this and heaven awaits with the utopian afterlife.

QQ : 10   TIS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY

Perhaps we need to invent new ceremony.

We could celebrate peace in the Middle East with an annual giving of our time to those who need it. It occurs to me that our time is the most valuable thing that we have. It is limited, absolutely.

We could celebrate the cure for cancer with an annual, ritual, community meal of exclusively, locally- grown, organic food.

We could celebrate the elimination of carbon-based fuels with a decorated, live camellia tree at a community center with music and dance.

But then again, we seem to prefer the more primitive ritual involving eggs and bunnies, dead pines and fat old guys in red suits. And avoid those oysters at all cost, otherwise G-d will strike you down! And if not for that, then for inserting the forbidden "o" in the word.




Etched on my stone tablet.

Monday 5 December 2011

QQ : NUMBER EIGHTEEN - December 5, 2011

 A ONCE-A-WEEK (or so) LIST OF WHAT I  GIVE A  DAMN ABOUT. WITH 10 = MOST IMPORTANT;  AND 1 = NOT SO MUCH


IT'S ALL A MATTER OF DEGREE


QQ : 1  DRY ICE

Sarah Palin is hot. She radiates the warm blood of a freshly-killed moose.
Michelle Bachmann is cold. Dry ice is the solid form of Carbon Dioxide. Her detractors claim that CO2 is warming the earth.
Michelle has celestially-inspired, contrary evidence.
Dry ice must be the answer to global warming when hell freezes over, or when she becomes president.
Which-ever event happens first.


QQ : 2. MARLBORO MAN

Bubba Clinton is hot. He blows the saxophone and got blown.
Jazz is either hot or cool. Jazz is not smooth. Bubba does not blow smooth.

Barry Obama does not play the saxophone. He blows Marlboro Lights.
That is not cool and he is not hot.
Barry is smooth and getting smoother as he slides away into the smoke and mirrors of a compromising wasteland of indecision and failed commitments. Smooth jazz is not jazz.

QQ : 3.   DIG GRUNDIG

Recorded music was hot on an early sixties Grundig Stereo Console playing vinyl.
Analog tape-recording achieved a theoretical fidelity that was infinite with respect to human hearing capabilities.

When music was sampled and digitized, the sample rate has always been limited by cost and memory limitations.
The heat is lost. Digitized music is cold.
Not only is digitized music emotionally cold, it is economically cold.
Digitized music has lost its economic heat.
99 cents is too much to pay for cold noise.

QQ : 4.  TECHNICOLOR

When Jazz was hot, Jackson Pollock painted Charles Mingus.
When Jazz was cool, Mark Rothko painted Thelonius Monk.
When Jazz got smooth, George W Bush painted Kenny G in monochrome.

QQ : 5.   INFLUENZA WITHOUT FEVER

When Bob Dylan rocked, he a'changed the times. The streets were on fire.
When Curt Cobain burned, the boys were hot with anger and rage.
When Rihanna sings, we chill.
The New York Times describes Drake's new album in the context of form without content.
That's cold. 99 cents is too much to pay for the common cold.

QQ : 6  IT'S A GAS GAS GAS

When Jack Kerouac was "On The Road" there was no speed limit.
That was sizzling hot.
Jack was also the architect of cool.
When I tried to re-trace his steps during the gasoline crisis the speed limit was fifty-five miles per hour.
My electric-blue 1964, T-Bird convertible with hydraulic, retractable hard top was the ultimate in cool.
That said - when the Texas Highway Patrol issued my speeding ticket, that almost blew my cool
Jumping' Jack Flash, you were a gas.

QQ : 7. THE COOL OF TEPID

The new feudalism has established the separation of powers; those with heat and those without. 
It seems that the Middle Class was a social construct that is no longer needed by the hot 1%.
The problem is that when the serfs start to freeze, they will find a way to keep warm at some cost to those who denied them the means to keep warm in the first place.
Even though the Middle Class may be an artificial, luke-warm construct, it forms the glue that maintains a balance that is civilizing.
Without it, we are tribal and primitive.
Perhaps ‘tepid’ is the necessary petrie dish for growth, culture and innovation.

QQ : 8   NINETY EIGHT DEGREES

Truth burns. Truth scalds. Truth cuts.
As mortal beings, we exist in denial.
Our current, universally-accepted state of denial is: that we as individuals do not share responsibility for our larger global dilemmas.
Blame?
Protest?
Occupy?

Teachers‘ unions are not responsible for the breakdown of the family.
Wall Street is not responsible for the lack of legislative regulation.
It is not Europe's fault that Greek oligarchs refuse to pay taxes.
Hitler did not come to power without the assistance of Ford, DuPont, GM and GE.

And then there are the Koch brothers.
A vote for Mitt, Newt, The late great Herm or the two Dicks is a vote for the Koch.
The SCOTUS tells us that the Koch are people.
I'm not so sure. I would like to take their temperature to see if they are alive. Rectally.


QQ : 9 ABSOLUTE ZERO

They say that hell is a hot place. Global warming?

QQ : 10.   KELVIN

The internal combustion engine is conceptually unchanged since its original invention 100 years ago. It depends on fire. That fire is destructive.

Nuclear reactors depend on a controlled explosion of unstable uranium.
The waste material is eternally destructive.

With what we perceive to be unprecedented access to technological innovation and infinite computing power, our dependence on ancient sources of heat is majorly uncool.