Wednesday, 25 May 2016


QQ : NUMBER FORTY SEVEN - MAY 25, 2016


TWELVE THINGS THAT DONALD DOESNT 'GET'

1.   99.99999999999% of Muslims are not terrorists.

2.   Women menstruate.
I guess his Daddy didn't have that little talk with him.

3.   China is a country, not a business.
America is a country, not a business.
'Small-hand' Donny is a business, not a country.

4.   ISIS is not gathering in military formation waiting to be carpet-bombed.

5.   Coal is over.

6.   Spanish is the second most spoken language in the USA.
In fact the US is the second largest Spanish speaking country in the world.
Hola. 

7.   Vlad Putin, little Kim and the Hell's Angels are not his friends.

8.   The Iran nuclear deal appears to be functioning.

9.   America is not a Monarchy.
A moat with a draw-bridge as an alternative to the wall?
We already had that tea party.

10.  Conservatism. Ronny is turning in his grave.
He was a much better actor and that's not saying much.

11.  Christianity as in "Do unto others..…"
That doesn't mean that Donald should respond in-kind to the former Mexican president's suggestion that Donny should go fuck himself.

12.  Imposing duty on imported goods will result in reactive duty on US exports. Zero sum.

DONALD YOU'RE FIRED



Etched on my stone tablet

EDITING : BATSHEVA

Sunday, 10 January 2016

QQ : NUMBER FORTY SIX - JANUARY 10, 2016

                   THEY COULD HAVE BEEN CONTENDERS:

Eleven Republican presidential contenders.  In case any of them don't make it all the way  to "1600"  - no worries.
Here is a list of reasonable facsimile, presidential jobs for each of them.


1.  DONALD TRUMP: President of the United States of PIGS - that is -
Portugal-Ireland-Greece-Spain.

Famous campaign Statements:

"I'll send all those Portuguese rapists back to where they came from......Mexico".
"Then I'll build a wall around PIGS, paid for by the sale of Irish Mosques".
 "I'll make Sparta huge, really 'Huge and Great' again and defeat Athens in partnership with my new, bosom buddy,  Vlad,  the Tootin''- Shootin'- Putin".

Campaign slogan: "Free the Bacon".


2.  TED CRUZ:
President  of Persia.

Famous Campaign Statements:

"We'll carpet bomb ISIS". "After all we make the worlds finest carpets here in Persia".

Campaign slogan: "Trump's got a rug.....I got carpets".



3. BEN CARSON:
President  of Oz

Famous Campaign Statements:

"We're not in Kansas anymore". "Someone wake me up when we're over the rainbow".

Campaign slogan:  "It's not brain surgery".


4.  JEB!  President  of Tijuana.

Famous Campaign Statements:

"Some of my best friends are Mexican". "Take my wife........"
"W is the smart one"

Campaign slogan: "Jed-i". 
 

5.  CHRIS CHRISTIE: President  of the Republic of Puerto Rico.

"Bridge, who needs a bridge"? "Hugs,I'll give you hugs, even Obama if I have to".

Campaign slogan: "I protected Puerto Rico from  9/11, I'll keep it safe from ISIS".


6.  MARCO RUBIO:
President of Chipotle.

Famous Campaign Statements:

"Chipotle is the model for how I will destroy ISIS". "Selective decimation using tortillas as the ultimate WMD".
"Who needs Obamacare?   At Chipotle ...we take care of our own."

Campaign slogan: "I was a poor black sharecropper in Cuba". "Look at me now".


7.  CARLY FIORINA: President of Libya.

Famous Campaign Statements:

"Little Italy will be born again in the former Italian colony of Benghazi" "Revolutionary HP technology will print pasta for all, so the layoffs of unnecessary employees will be mitigated".
"What's wrong with my face"? "I had to get time off from 101 Dalmatians to do this".
"Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom". "Might take me a minute".

Campaign slogan:  "Laying off 30,000 people is just the beginning".
"You're gonna get laid (off)".


8.  MIKE HUCKABEE:
President  of Jerusalem

Famous Campaign Statements:

"The end times are here". "You're all going to hell". (Bass players excluded).
"I'm the decider". "I have a direct line to God and he told me so". "You're all a bunch of fornicators and it's time I banned fornication for good". "I'm the anti-fornicators in chief"

Campaign slogan: "Jesus had a permit to carry". "So should you".


9.  JOHN KASICH:
President  of Disneyland

Famous Campaign Statements:

 "Disneyland is the happiest place on earth and I intend to keep it that way".
"There are no poor people, no sick people, and no troubled people in my Disneyland".
"We will bring Dis-mocracy to the Middle East and ISIS will embrace Mickey Mouse as their savior". "Peace will prevail".

Campaign slogan: "It's a small world.  Yes it is."


10.  RAND PAUL:
President  of The Democratic Republic of the Congo

Famous Campaign Statements:

"Now here's a nation I can get my teeth into". "Here we have the ultimate example of freedom from big government". "In fact it's freedom from any government". "Free enterprise at its finest".
"Let freedom reign". "Ayn Rand would have loved this place". "Only the strongest survive, or eat or have medical care or human rights of any kind". "My kinda place".

Campaign slogan: "Live and let live". "Eat or be eaten".


11.  RICK SANTORUM: 
  President of Las Vegas.


Famous Campaign Statements:

"What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas". "Sodom and Gomorrah were nothing compared to this place"."You think I'm just gonna turn you all into pillars of salt"? That was nothin'". "Watch me you sinners". "I'll nuke the place and any other place that kills babies, and defies the second amendment".
"God gave me rights and wrote them into the constitution...., personally".
"Fear me and fear god because together we'll bring down ultimate retribution for all you sinners".

Campaign slogan: "I'm a happy -go -lucky guy". "Watch me take it to the next level... Defcon 5."




www.johncapek.com

Etched on my stone tablet.

Edited by Batsheva

Friday, 30 October 2015


QQ : NUMBER FORTY FIVE  - OCTOBER 30, 2015

THE NO INFOMERCIAL

The amount of real information available to us is minuscule. The news media are vehicles of entertainment to keep us amused. The debates......polit-tainment TV fodder.

Bob Woodward recently asked Al Gore, the former vice president how much of what went on in the White House “was of interest of consequence” that is now generally known.

ANSWER: "1 percent.”

Gore's answer is not specific to any particular administration. It is a truth across the board.
We don't know shit about 99% of what is really going on. That probability of ignorance has deep meaning. It is similar in significance to the 99% - 1% economic divide.

THINGS I'D LIKE TO KNOW:


QQ 1: ISOL-OIL THE NEXT NAME BRAND AT YOUR LOCAL GAS STATION.

A recent Financial Times featured article reported that ISIS is freely, expansively and aggressively functioning in the world oil economy. Thousands of trucks each carrying $10,000 worth of oil wait in line for days by the Syrian oil fields to fill up, deliver sell and return for more. They do this under the eyes of the two biggest military powers in the history of the world.
Who is protecting them? How much is the reduced price of gasoline based on the ISIS discount? Why?

QQ 2: MAINLINE

What's the real deal with the Afghanistan poppy industry?
To what extent are we supporting and benefitting that industry at the cost of life and liberty?
It has been reported that poppy growth is at an all time high.
Is this the 20 year war in support of drugs. Who are the beneficiaries?

QQ 3: A TWO STATE DISSOLUTION

What is Bibi Netanyahu's end game? The status quo cannot endure. He must have a plan.
What the hell is it? Playing war games like a recovering drug addict 'one day at a time' is not a strategy. Or, perhaps it is.

QQ 4: NUKE-EM

It is not possible that Iran, a sophisticated, educated, scientific entity - and after 50 years of development, has not built a nuclear weapon. Of course they have. Tunneling is perhaps one of the most primitive and effective tools of war. We do not have the bunker-busting weapons to destroy their nuclear infrastructure and if we did, the devastation would be world shattering.

What is the real story?

QQ 5: FIBER OPTICS? FUCK FIBER.

Technology is useless. Or, at least in the manner with which we have misused our breakthrough discoveries. We have not cured starvation, illiteracy, malaria, ebola, cancer or even the common cold. We have made the planet a trash heap, destroyed the climate and perfected weapons of mass destruction a thousand times over. Volkswagen, how many people did you kill today with your sophisticated technology?

Technology is neutral. It is not inherently good. Using the tools of contemporary technology where is the timeless, anthemic art created that will last for eternity?
Is there, or has there been a digital Bach, Rembrandt, Shakespeare or Michelangelo?.

Why are we so invested in useless destructive technology? WTF, LOL. Text me an answer on your 150 year old QUERTY keyboard. Why do we care?

QQ 6: BIG BROTHER

The NSA and similar entities in this country and others continue functioning in the digital wasteland. Homeland Security does not secure the homeland when our schools, movie theaters and sporting events cannot be protected. There is a disconnect. There clearly must be an unknown agenda, or one which I clearly do not understand.

Why are they watching us? It's not working for us.

QQ 7: THE COCK BRO AGENDA

The Koch Brothers are business men. I can't accept that they are dogmatic idealists. They must know that, historically, the slaves, the underclass, the poor and the oppressed always revolt. Social unrest and civil war cannot be good for business.

That being the case, what is the actual, real-world agenda of these sibling oligarchs?

"Less Government" is a catch phrase or slogan that resonates with the ignorant and the idealist. Unless, of course, we make all roads toll roads; hire a mercenary military; privatize all education and eliminate all social protections and structures. With the 'cock agenda' we would eliminate pollution controls, health laws, safety laws, Social Security, Medicare, Welfare, Food Stamps and the rest.

What's the Koch plan when they gain control and become the Washington puppeteers?

Or perhaps they already are.

QQ 8: BIG PHARMA

Tetracycline, $1000 a bottle at you local pharmacy. Really?
It's broken. Or is it a Koch thing? Ben Carson has the answer.

QQ 9: PUTIN IN THE RITZ.

Of course he would like to recapture and rebuild the Soviet Empire. Why not? Who's gonna stop him? Crimea is his Sudetenland. Estonia, Latvia, the rest of Ukraine are next on the list.
Do we have a strategy to stop this megalomaniac and his oligarch supporters?
Are the Koch Bro's and President Trump gonna Nuke the Kremlin? Oligarch versus oligarch.
Bring on the good Doctor Strangelove.

QQ 10: THE JOBS DILEMMA

There are no "middle class" jobs. We decimated the middle class by destroying the union movement.

The union movement brought us protection from exploitation. This regression has an ultimate negative outcome. That outcome is a problem.

Does Bernie Sanders have a solution? Or perhaps we should look to Larry David.
I think he may have the answer. (to everything).

I think I'll vote for Larry as a write-in at the next election.


Etched on my stone tablet

Edited by Batsheva

Tuesday, 6 October 2015

QQ : NUMBER FORTY FOUR - OCTOBER 6, 2015




THE MORAL QUOTIENT


Who holds the moral high ground?

There are a multitude of claimants including the Pope, the Ayatollah, ISIS, Mike Huckabee and Roger Waters.

Speaking to God and getting an answer could be a symptom of delusional thinking.  
Getting the answer on a golden tablet or a scroll could be the result of ingesting too many drugs, or it could be a true miracle. Or the mortal conversant could just be a clinical narcissist.

I’m not currently getting a clear response from God on this question.  Her internet may be down.  Reception is not good in Missouri.


QQ 1: AMERICA

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a re-dress of grievances”.

This thing is so full of holes it is a sieve. It is badly written and confuses "rights" with admonitions to lawmakers. No wonder the SCOTUS is confused.

Scientology declares itself a religion and reaps billions in tax benefits.
The right to peaceably assemble is contra-indicated by the militarizing of local police. Courts are accessible, but generally only to the wealthy.  Same with justice.
In addition, "corporations" are now "people",  protected by that disastrously written paragraph.

I hereby establish The Church of QAPEK. Contributions are welcome.

I give the first amendment a 1/10 on the MORALITY HYPOCRISY SCALE.

QQ 2: THE (RAW) IRAN DEAL

The Republican Majority, AIPAC and a number of Jewish Federations suggest we should reject the deal on "moral grounds".

The suggestion is that the entity known as IRAN is inherently evil and inherently immoral, in totality, for all eternity.

Reflecting on her experience in Auschwitz, my mother suggested to me that there were three levels of evil in order:
#3 most evil were the German SS
#2 most evil were the Ukrainian guards
#1 and by far the worst were the Jewish Kapos who made life and death decisions based on their own self-interest and survival.

There is no such thing as inherent, total evil.

I give conservatives' rejection of the Iran deal a 2/10 in MORAL HYPOCRISY.

QQ 3: GOOGLE ......"You can make money without doing evil".

Google survives on "content" and the distorted concept of the "democracy of the internet". Google does not pay for the content that allows it to survive. Google is a thief of the highest order.

I give Google a 3/10 on the MORAL HYPOCRISY SCALE.

QQ 4:. FREUD AND SCHADENFREUDE

We have slaughter in Syria, ethnic cleansing in Africa, starvation in Darfur, the greatest refugee crisis since the Second World War, child poverty in the richest country in the history of the world and the subjugation and incarceration of millions of African-Americans in the US Prison-Industrial-Complex.

What do the activists both left and right focus on?  What do we prioritize? On what basis are we prepared to shut down government?

It's the politics of sex.

From the Supreme Leader to the US Congress. From the Pope to a small town clerk.
They all want to get into our pants as their top priority.

Leave sex to the sexual. Get married already, I really don't care. I'll be wearing my gownless evening strap.

Government stay out of the womb and just for the hell of it, give a Saudi housewife her driver's licence and let her out of the tent.

Beyond that the Caitlin Jenner thing makes me want to barf. WTF. Does his constant presence in my face reflect the true meaning of the first amendment?
He has a penis last time I checked. (Not personally).

At the risk of committing the ultimate, politically-incorrect faux pas, may I suggest that there may be larger, more important issues.

I give this noisy, Freudian agenda a MORAL QUOTIENT of 4/10 in hypocrisy.

QQ 5:. THE EXPECTATION AND REQUIREMENT THAT OUR ARTISTIC ICONS BE "GOOD".

I have no idea if Johann Sebastian Bach was a good man. He had two wives and bore 20 children. We can surmise that he was busy. We cannot judge his goodness.
He created perhaps the greatest musical beauty in the history of man. How shall we judge him in historical retrospect?

Who was Shakespeare? Was there such a person? Was he good?

Pablo Picasso was a prick who treated women as disposable possessions.
He was a fabulous painter who changed our perception of visual art for all eternity.
He could be regarded as a bad man. How shall we judge his art?

I give our moral expectations regarding our artistic icons a 5/10 in MORAL HYPOCRISY.

QQ 6: HIP-HOP AS A CULTURE

What can one say about Kanye West, Dr Dre, other 'rap physicians',  Biggie Small, M&M and Drake that hasn't already been said.

The tradition of poetry spoken to rhythm and music is long established. That is not the problem. Perhaps the problem is the wacky first amendment thing.

Bitches ain’t sh*t but hoes and tricks / Lick on these nuts and suck the d*ck.” – Snoop Dogg

Once again I gotta punch a bitch in her sh*t / I’m icy bitch, don’t look at my wrist / Because if you do, I might blind you bitch.” – Jasper Dolphin of Odd Future

I know she like chocolate men / She got more n*ggas off than Cochran.” – Kanye West

You ain’t no better because you don’t be f*cking rappers / You only f*ck with actors / You’re still getting f*cked backwards” – Jay

Slut, you think I won’t choke no whore / Til the vocal cords don’t work in her throat no
You ain’t gonna let me f*ck you and I feel you / But you gone suck my d*ck, or I’ll kill you.” – Chief Keef


If art is a reflection of the zeitgeist, then the zeitgeist is in very, very, very poor shape.

Hiphop 'culture' gets a 6/10 on my MORAL HYPOCRISY SCALE.

QQ 7: SAUDI ARABIA and THE EMIRATES

In a previous paragraph, I suggested that there is no such thing as inherent, absolute evil. I would now like to amend that statement. 

Evil exists. It is Saudi Arabia. If ever there was an evil empire, then this has got to be it... closely followed by the Emirates. Apparently, the pronouncements of the Saudi Potentate is the expression of God's will.

Slave labor, misogynist, corrupt, criminal, feudal, fundamentally evil in all aspects.
Cut off my hand to spite my face.

A 7/10 on the MORALITY QUOTIENT.

QQ 8: MONSANTO

Patents on seeds. Really? They have a copyright on my carrot? A patent on my potato? A claim on my cabbage?
The absolute peak of evil, the end of the world as we know it.
You own the copyright of seeds?
State of the art bullshit.

Monsanto gets an 8/10 on the MORALITY SCALE.

QQ 9: EVANGELISM

There are many "isms",  but the 'evangel' wins first prize for moral hypocrisy.
The word has a benign, Greek root referring to "good news".  If only that were so.
A more common usage is related to a presentation of the "gospel" as an unquestionable truth.

That is when evangelism, as a presentation of unquestionable truth, the divine truth as expressed by the Ayatollahs of Islam of any variety, Mike Huckabee, and Kim Jong-Il reach a peak of moral insanity.

I'm reminded of the image of Henry Kissinger, kneeling down to pray with Richard Nixon one particularly boozy evening in the Oval Office. I think Bubba Clinton made a much better use of that space...if somewhat less evangelical.

A 9/10 in MORAL OUTRAGE.

QQ 10: THE GLOBAL WARMING 'DEBATE'

Who are some of the largest, per-capita polluters in the world? 
Benign”  Australia and Canada.

According to the "I-am-not-a-scientist" experts, the  polar bears are just fine;  California, not unlike adolescents,  is going through a ‘phase’; and BP is a person.

The Global Warming deniers get a 10/10 on the MORAL HYPOCRISY SCALE.

QQ 11: ALGORITHMS AND ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE

The machines have taken over. Drones, drone on as programmed assassins based on computer game technology, the Googles select our participation grid, the TV reflects algorithmic choices at us and we are followed, pursued, categorized, and spied on from birth through death and beyond.

Freedom’s just another word for everything left to lose.
It's 1984 all over again.

It's beyond an 11/10 in MORAL DEGRADATION. God is dead. The Algorithms have taken her place. A.I. has nailed us to a cross.

QQ 12: GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE

Really?